Music
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INTR0.
Me, MySelf and I.
Age: 18 (290393)
School: ITE College Central Bishan
Negative Thinkers
[[Male/SINGLE]]
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Islam / Muslims
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Emo-Scene Kid
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* Musician
- Guitarist
- Bassist
- Keyboard [L]
- Drums [L]
- Vocal [L]
* Listening To Music
* Love To DeeJay
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Friday, December 30, 2011 @ 6:18 AM
I kind of miss the past ... I mean, the past and the path you choose was the one who make, Who You Are Today . right? I wish i could travel back in time to see what i did in the past . It like what they say, childhood moment was the best because no one judge you. but when you grew older people become so judgmental . I don't understand, why must they judge or degrade other people so much? Does people misery bring them joy? If that's the case, maybe I should give them their own medicine. Human should not judge other people of how to live their life because we all come in a different family background. I really hate it when my cousins or relative start to judge me. That's just pisses me off! If i could, i just want to shout, " Who The Hell You Think You Are?! " I mean i don't tell you how to live your life did i? why must you comment on my life? Seriously, I just wish that I could give them a piece of my mind BUT ... I can't because I was taught to Respect other People . I can't disappoint my parents and be rude to people just because of my emotion right? All I wanted to do is To Make My Parents Proud & Proof To Them That I Am Not That Weak Child That They Thought I was . I Love My Family Even Though I Don't Really Show It
Sunday, December 25, 2011 @ 9:52 AM
We were playing Moment Of Truth And I asked what's the first impression My Classmate in Bishan told me this . " Rif, the first time when i or we saw you. You are quite rather attractive but then when we hear you talked and your expression all come out then we know you are quite soft too " Well, maybe that why all my EXs leave me? because I'm too soft? But if that's the case, they should know me well first before breaking my heart. =( Oh well, that was in the past. At least now I know Thanks to my IO2 Classmate <3 . Love you guys so much I shared this piece of info. with my BFF and he kinda think this through abit but slightly agreed to what I said. Honestly, I don't ask for this.
@ 9:40 AM
 I have a very high energy for today and yesterday, Xmas Eve. maybe because it is like a Red-Day for me! ahahaha I love it so much, it is like i get my energy from the colour red. It brings me so hyper. anyways, today i met up with my friend and went to visit my friend aliff at the hospital because he was admitted . after that around 7+ we went back to tampines and go shopping on Xmas gift 'cause my friend ariffin and myself need to do a Xchange gift later this week. after that we head to airport to sent our friend Shafenaz to dubai for 1month. awww! hope she gonna have loads of fun 'cause she is not gonna attend school for 2 week after the school re-open. Fun right? I hope i got that kind of luck, oh well ? after that we went home, the winx club went home together and separated at pasir ris. then me and my BFF went home together and had a catchup session. Haizz .. I guess that was okay for Xmas day uh? C'ya then ... =)
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 @ 10:15 AM
let start by saying everyone has a UPs & DOWNs . for me .. I'm still quite unclear of myself This thursday on 22nd of December 2011, I'm suppose to go oversea with my friends. So today I had to ask my parents for permission . So did and they turn my down. they say no to any solution i tried to explain . they just wouldn't want to listen to me. No I'm not complaining because I'm a teenager. I know that at this age of being a teenager many people don't get us but something about my parent really had me thinking this much .. I just could still remember when I was young, i always been bullied by my cousins, brothers for being too soft =(( .. among the whole family, i'm the only one whose been bullied so badly until today it still haunt me ='( I just kept it to myself until i grow old. I never speak of this to anyone not even my parents. why not my parent? because they should be the one protecting me when i was being bullied but no they just sat there and think that i was gonna be okay. when they called me name, i looked at my mum with the tears in my SOUL . as my own parent didn't even stood for me . but it's okay. I learnt how to be strong as i grow older. when other kids play catching and have fun. of cuz I played a few time but most of the time I was always told to stay home because of my asthmatic =( sometime i'm so sick and tired of this shit . but whatever it is, I'm still loyal to my parent even though they do such things to me. I'm aware that I'm not the only one who is going through all of this. I thank god of what i have and what i've been through.
Saturday, December 17, 2011 @ 10:07 PM
Finally! After all the shit that I've done .. I got the position that make me so happy! I'm suppose to meet other College Central Committee to discuss about what to expect for next year cca and plan the budget and performance and such .. then we came to this part about who became what? in the central we only got 5 committee . so the teacher plan is 1 president, and 4 exco. so we had to vote who to become the president, at first they pick this girl name hafizah but she decline, so they pick me. at first i also don't want but came to consideration i took the role. this is the time for me to proof that I'm a Somebody! I'm not a Blind Hyped-up Admin who do shit for people .. This is where I am gonna make a change =) . I'm so happy ! Thank god for this opportunity.
Monday, December 12, 2011 @ 5:37 AM
It has been a while since I last blog, I just came to realize that I need this time or space to actually express myself out. And today, I finally found out the answer to my question that I always asked myself. Let's start what happen today Today I got a Drama Workshop but in fact those who were called down were actually the Drama committee which were specially picked out by our instructor. So in the morning I woke up around 9am? I found out that I was late 'cause the workshop is 9am to 5pm. ahaha is this how a Committee Member should behave? Anyways! I met my friends at MacDonalds and Off to the School to had our workshop training. We did alot of activity together and individually. Okay so you might be wondering what so urgent, or why is it that I finally want to blog again? The reason why I want to blog again is because I got no freaking one to turn too. That's the truth. Lover? What's the point of expressing when your partner got problems also Best Friend? There's a certain thing that you just can't tell your BFF. Friends? Will they understand or even bother? Family? It is personal, the thing about me is that, I don't like to share my life story to my family because I was raise differently and taught not to trouble anyone. Anyways! back to the story. So yea, we were having activities to bond us and make us work together until this activity came up. The activity was to identify yourself whether are you:
So all of us sat in a circle and talk one by one. Then I also notice that our instructor, Ms. Aidli Mosbit commented on each and everyone of us who have said our part. when it came to my turn, I pick Talent and Leadership because of my past experience. then it all came down to this part. I was really waiting for her to comment on me, so that I know what's my strength and weaknesses. So the word that came out from her mouth and really really upset me and disappoint with myself is this, she said, I am the type of person who give Support to others, a hyped type of person, a person where most of the loud ones need to be with, without my type of person their are nothing. well at first I take it positively but then, something just strike my mind. Am I like a dog to a human? Am I like an assistant to a boss? Am I like a Side-Kick to a hero? She is not the only person who told me this, there was a few of my friend who actually talked to me about this. One of them said this things to me already but he said in a positive kind of way. he said I'm like those who always hyped up a group to do something. Like a Support Morale kind of thing. I really appreciate the phrase he tried to put up without hurting my feelings but we both know that you can't fool me with words. Well, that's not the only thing that upset me today. After all that, we are suppose to break-up into 4 Different Groups.
I'm not complaining about anything but .. Unfortunately I was chosen to be in Administrator? there was 3 of us. And the way I see it, they looked at us as if we got no freaking talent but Paper Work, A DOG kinda work. A Backstage Work to Support the Front ones ! What The Fuck?! Of course I didn't show my emotion because I was taking it professionally. but I mean come on! There were alot of other people but why me? It not that I don't want to be in this group but I mean I deserve or I think I capable of doing much better than Admin stuff! Fuck it, this is so unfair! Under estimating someone capability is so wrong! Why can't I be in Leadership because I don't know how to lead & be loud? Why can't I be in Talent because I got none?? Why can't I be in Writer & Director because I am officially not good enough? I really really sad about this situation but I guess there is nothing I can do and no one I can tell to .. So yea ='(( you have no idea what it is like to be in my shoe right now to be born with this kind of personality and attitude. Questions Of My Life ..
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